Friday, October 28, 2011

Project Runway: Finale Part 2

There will be a haiku and recap soon, but I'm just too disappointed to even think about that right now. What a fixed season. Waste. Of. Time.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Gossip Girl: The Fasting and the Furious

Chuck seeks therapy
Diana blackmails Charlie
Dan gets a friend back

First off, this had to be the funniest episode of Gossip Girl in awhile. Was it intentional funny? I'm not sure, but I sure did enjoy it despite the presence of the royal family and all the terrible hair.

In a few words, Serena tried to get the movie rights to Dan's book and pulled some shady stuff, got called out on it and then blamed the fact that she was jealous that Blair seemed to be Dan's new intended. She said he was the love of her life. I'd probably be more appreciative of her slutty ways if after each man she slept with she looked longingly at the picture of her and Dan she still keeps on her bed side table. They end up making up and Dan says her company can have the movie rights. Blair almost signed away her first born child to the royal family. Louis's sister refrained from making out with a priest but still maintained her annoying scheming ways. Chuck hit on another ugly lady - this time a therapist - only to come back after her rejection and tell her he needs her for actual therapy.

Oh, yeah. He hits on her cause she dresses like that. Nate and Charlie helped Diana launch her website. Charlie got some intel on the VDW and Bass family [I love how they kept texting that!] and one page that tied Diana to Bart's past - but for now it's a seeeeecreeeeet. Louis found the paternity test and called  [I think this was supposed to be a TWIST] the same therapist Chuck was trying to bone.

Read my other thoughts - mostly in pictures - after the JUMP!

Friday, October 21, 2011

Project Runway: Finale Part One

Tim visits each one
with hugs, kisses and feedback-
but was there a point?

So one thing I hate about Project Runway is they have the top four designers, tell them they are all going to the finale, but the finale isn't actually the finale because they have to show three looks then one gets aufed again. It's like calling the entire season the finale - but breaking it down into a bunch of episodes. I won't even get into the fact that the top 9 designers got to show at Fashion Week which kind of downplays all the pleas throughout the season of designers saying, "I've been wanting to show at Fashion Week since I was 3." Someone needs to be serious next time and say, "I know I just need to get through a few weeks to show at Fashion Week but what I am really here for is the money. I also hope the franchise likes me enough so that I can keep getting paid to be on tv." I will say that my favorite part of the finale is when we get to see not only he designers' home/work spaces, but how Tim interacts with the designer at their home.

Heidi meets with the final four designers and tells them they have $9,000 and five weeks to complete a 10 piece line. One person will be eliminated when they designers return to NYC.

Last Designers Sitting.
At this point, the designers head off to their homes to begin working. Three weeks later, Tim takes his tour and stops in to meet with each designer, give his feedback and be adorable. First he heads to White Plains, Maryland to see how Kimberly is doing. Her house is adorable. She explains that her line is inspired by pre-gentrified Brooklyn - the "urban girl, transformed." She has an updated sweat pant (I love sweat pants, but is that fashion forward?) in her line along with an awful sarape shirt. This is what Tim thinks of Kimberly's work so far:

I'm confused.
Next Tim heads to Trinidad to see Anya. Trinidad is gorgeous! Anya first takes Tim to meet her brothers. They talk about how great she is. I roll my eyes. Then she tells a sad story about her brother that passed away at age 18 so I take back my eye roll. When Tim heads back to her studio to see her line, he gets to see nothing. All she has is some fabric and some pictures of her inspiration. He gives her a stern talking to about progress and throws in a line stating that she knows she can't have any help. She did JUST learn to sew after all. Here's what Tim thinks of her lack of progress:

I'm concerned.
Find out what happens when Tim visits the men after the JUMP!

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Gossip Girl: Memoirs of an Invisible Dan

Dan's book is released
Serena and Blair are hurt
But Nate is saddest.

 There were so many things in this episode that made me say, "Yeah, right" starting with Dan's book being 1) printed so quickly and 2) being a pre-sale and post sale best seller.
  • Nate still looks really really good. Having sex with and old(er) lady does him good. I actually like how he's relishing in his new found edginess.
  • Diana AND Serena both in yellow tight dresses? There must've been a sale at the yellow dress store.
Serena's seemed real tight around the butt/crotch area. I wonder why.
  • Didn't IVY just miss a call last week from Carol? Wasn't the name shown to us? So we could know whose call she was ignoring?
  • I love that Blair's boobs have gotten bigger, but not her belly.
  • I actually thought exactly what Serena said about how every murder mystery begins this way [after everyone is summoned by a mysterious text from Dan].
  • Lily really enjoyed that Nate was gay in the book. I wonder what kind of dreams she has about him.
  • Everyone reads really fast. Oh wait, they just read the parts about them. Now it makes sense.
  • Chuck Bass = Charlie Trout! Love it.
  • Nate isn't important enough to get a full fleshed out part. I think that's how the writers of Gossip Girl feel.
  • Serena's reaction to Dan's book is ridiculous. I guess she finally did some work and thinks she'll never get a job again? I wish those were my problems. 
  • Awwww, Lily and Chuck's friendship and their moment was really nice.
  • Rufus's "angry" moment with Dan was soooooo melodramatic. I wasn't quite sure if he was angry from the book or uncomfortable because of the tightness of his pants.
Seriously! Look at his crotch!
  • Lonely Boy = Actually lonely boy. Poor Dan.
  • I cannot wait for the movie of Inside to be cast! Can this be as good as the Seinfeld pals casting themselves?
  • I love that Nate was so upset that he stayed home and that he threw out the line about Serena and Blair being important enough to have an entire character. It was super cute.
  • Serena has a giant ass? When did this happen? This explains the tightness of the yellow dress:

  • Daniel Day Lewis is gonna sue about this episode, right?
Line of the night: "Your novel seems to be very well punctuated...and I like the font." Blair to Dan. True love.

Best dressed of the night goes to Chuck. I didn't love any particular dresses/outfits on anyone, so he wins for his pops of color and nicely fitted suits. Worst dressed has to be Blair's blue dress with awful, awful hem:

She looks like a hooker.
My other concern is what is up with the hairstylists on this show. The men (minus Dan) look really good. The women on the other hand have had awful hair.


Friday, October 14, 2011

Project Runway: The Final Challenge

Five designers left
Get inspired by an island
Not the one from LOST.

Five designers remain on this season's Project Runway:
  • Josh - the drama king whose eyebrows are always perfectly manicured, but his clothes are sometimes over the top
  • Anya - the sewing "prodigy" who the judges love despite the fact that her outfits always seem to look the same
  • Laura - the pretty pretty princess who has stayed primarily in the middle of the pack
  • Viktor - (my personal favorite) the guy with the amazing tailoring skills but also the first person to talk crap about his fellow designers
  • Kimberly - the winner of one challege, who like Laura, has stayed in the middle of the pack
Amazingly, at the beginning of this episode, Josh and Viktor are talking about how they are sad Bert left and Josh uses the opportunity to diss Anya's lack of sewing skills. Heidi tells the designers they will be transported by ferry (I seriously thought she meant fairy) to meet Tim Gunn and get out of the city. I guess Josh was really not sure what the challenge would be as he dressed for almost every occasion:

Boots, swim trunks and a necklace. Check, check and check.

On Governor's Island, the designers are tasked with designing three outfits based on the inspirations found on the island. Kimberly picks a sculpture called New Beginnings, Josh selects a chapel, Laura likes the circular patterns she finds around the island, Viktor decides to go metropolitan and Anya is most inspired by the sculptures' lines.

Once their hour of exploring and sketching are done, the inspired designers head to Mood. Nothing exciting happens there. Once back in the workroom, Tim comes in with the dreaded button bag.

Everyone dreads Tim's sack.
This time, it's actually so they can get help from the designers who have been previously eliminated. This means I GET TO SEE OLIVIER! Yay! He's dressed in shades of tan, beige and brown. I love it.

I missed you.
Find out what happens in the workroom and on the runway after the JUMP!

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Community: Remedial Chaos Theory

We saw six timelines
Which were great. But the best part:
Abed as Jafar!

Gossip Girl: The Jewel of Denial

Nate gets a plot line
Chuck, you are NOT the father
Dan takes ownership

Once again I was out on a Monday night so just caught up with Gossip Girl. This week the gang reunited at the Jenny Packham show (minus Serena?!), Blair found out the paternity of her baby despite stalling as long as possible, Dan took ownership of his book, Lily was released from house arrest, Charlie returned to NYC, Chuck got a dog and Nate realized what his job entailed.

Dan really was in good friend mode this week even as he tried to stop the release of his book. Despite his feelings for Blair, he was supportive and encouraging as she tried to ignore the paternity results that were delivered. He decided that the one thing that could help Chuck's non-feeling ways would be to get him a dog (where did this idea come from? Oh, Dan.) Finally, he came around to claiming ownership of his book - Inside - after his old mentor fake stole it. Authors and their humor. Sigh.

Nate, who looked extra hot in this episode, reported to his first day working under Diana.
More sex? C'mon!
And working under her was exactly what he did. When he finally complained that he was just there for sex, he said he could easily call the Senator and get an internship there. Like the Senator didn't want him for the exact same thing. Poor pretty Nate. Diana decided to get him involved in work and by work she meant instigating some drama. At the Jenny Packham party, he broke up a couple and then stole everyone's phone so that Diana could look through them and get juicy scoop. He was nice enough to put Dan and Blair's phones aside (I thought that was super nice), but at the end of the day is left with Ivy's. How long til he gets bored and starts investigating the mysterious Ivy?

Serena did nothing but wear a giant necklace and a messy ponytail. Oh, she pressured Charlie to stay in New York like a crazy person would do. Take a hint, Serena!

Chuck was still not feeling anything and was in shock when Dan brought him a dog. He got the dog fixed which to me seems very anti-Chuck Bass and after Blair informed him that the baby wasn't his, he cried in bed with Monkey the dog. I have two questions about Chuck (and really almost all the characters) 1) do they ever take off their shoes indoors or at least take off their jackets and ties? They are so formal indoors. 2) Why does Chuck make his O face when crying?

Blair spent the entire episode avoiding reading her paternity results. Turns out the baby is Louis's. Blah. That poor child will be bland. I can't believe they are headed in this direction. The one thing that may save this story line is that no one else actually saw the results of the test and Blair was shown hiding them. She could have been hiding them for the sole purpose that if Louis saw them he'd know she cheated on him or that (and I only hope this for drama) that Chuck is the actual father.

Charlie/Ivy realized that she didn't have to be pushed out of her role as Charlie; she had just as much information to blackmail Carol to going along with the plan. How stupid is this girl? She just now realized this?

I had a couple of favorite looks of the week. I liked Lily's polka dot dress, Nate in a suit and Chuck's purple tie and green shirt combo, but I have to give the award to Blair's Jenny Packham dress. I loved it. I was pissed when the next scene had her back in her plain dress with her hair back in disarray. Seriously, did they fire the hairstylist on this show? What is going on with everyone's hair?

Not the best pic but you get the idea.

Worst look of the week: Rufus's tight pants. Rufus, you are over 40. Stop now.

The line of the night - and kudos to the writers for this one - were three words I never thought I would hear on Gossip Girl: "Nate - that's brilliant." 

Monday, October 10, 2011

Breaking Bad: Face Off

A villain is born
The nursing home goes KABOOM
Now we'll have to wait.

Sadly, it's time for the Breaking Bad Season four finale: Face Off.

I hope they have the same prescription.
It would just make things easier.
This week's episode opens with Walt furiously running to remove the bomb from Gus's Volvo. He heads into the hospital to find Jesse and fill him in that Gus is on to them. Walt asks for the one place where they can take on Gus where there are no cameras. As Jesse strains to think of a place, two APD officers arrive to talk to Jesse about what he said to Andrea [ricin!]. They take him  in for questioning and act like dicks as Jesse tries to cover his ass. He says he must've learned about ricin on House [it's not lupus!] or the Discovery channel. As the cops continue to harp on him to try and get more info or a confession of some sort, he says, "Call Saul" - the signs work.
Spoiler: It's not ricin either!

Honey Tits is shredding evidence** of some sort at Saul's office while Walt bangs on the door. She never answers so Walt decides to break in. He needs Saul now. She mouths off and blackmails him for $25,000. He takes off to get the money [leaving through the broken door - he's inside and could unlock and open it - why is Walt being so dumb this episode?]. He drives home, and surveys the place before going in. Walt gets Information to call his neighbor and tells her to go over to check and make sure the burner is off (cause her life doesn't matter) so he can see if she gets murdered when walking over. He watches as she goes inside and two of Gus's henchmen escape via the backyard. Once he gets the all clear from the neighbor, he runs inside to get some money from the basement. While grabbing some cash, he sees the two men entering again and manages to escape via duct. Phew. He really must hate that neighbor.

Find out what happens next, after the JUMP!

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Breaking Bad: Face Off (Damn Straight)

Recap coming soon  - I just couldn't wait! Also, it was freaking amazing. 

Friday, October 7, 2011

Project Runway: This is for the Birds

Bird inspired gowns
To advertise eyeshadow
The bird did Bert in

I think I had blocked out the auf and winner from last week's challenge because when I saw the, "Last week on Project Runway," intro and was reminded who won and who lost, I was instantly put into a bad mood.

This week there are only six designers remaining - three women and three men. For some reason, Viktor thinks the one person who can beat him is Bronze Josh. I seriously DO NOT GET fashion - because I think 75% of BroJo's stuff is tickity-tack-tacky.
Say whaaaat?
Heidi tells the remaining designers that this week they need to spread their wings:

I would assume this would be a challenge for Victoria Secret's Angel Wing thing they always do (plus, Heidi models for them), but everyone jumps to the conclusion that it's going to be about skydiving. Seriously? I'm glad this isn't Jeopardy.
Bert just nods because he can't hear.
On clearance at Hot Topic.
Tim meets the designers in the workroom and introduces them to some birds that will serve as the inspiration for their runway looks. The birds are pretty freaking awesome  - especially the raven and the owl. Kimberly is like, "Oh, hell no!" Anya is in pain from her giant earrings. Viktor wears an ugly necklace. The winner of this challenge will their designs in an adver-torial (advertising editorial for L'oreal) in Marie Claire magazine and get $20,000! Tim announces that the designers will be put into pairs. He then assigns a bird to each team - sadly no one gets the owl - but then TWIST! their partner is really the person they are competing head to head again. So all the happy lovely moments they had talking about how much they loved their partner is disregarded for hatred (not really, just a side eye or two).

Bert struggles because he says the parrot's natural colors are too dime store. Mother Nature, get on that. Kimberly is a little worried because during their avant garde challenge, she used a bird as her inspiration. Bronze Josh buys some tacky feathers:

Big Bird's cousins.
OMG - Anya has a smaller version of her ginormous earrings!

Either size, I think they are ugly.

Tim comes in to announce another TWIST! to the challenge. They will all need to design a second look that their model will wear on the runway. For $20,000, I'd say they should have to make two looks. They are all worried, but Bert is probably most worried since he hates his bird. Anya decides to do structured look which probably won't work well since her sewing skills are lacking [she really should've gone home for those split pants!].

Find out how everyone deals with the TWIST! after the JUMP!

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Gossip Girl: Beauty and the Feast

Chuck Bass wants feelings
Serena hijacks Charlie
Blair leans on Humphrey

For some reason my CW went blank for the first 10 minutes of this week's Gossip Girl (Booo tv malfunctions) soooo, this isn't a full recap, just a few thoughts on the episode:

  • Chuck has decided that being in danger is his new high/way to find feelings again. This is too: Susan on Desperate Housewives, Britta on Community and Bella in New Moon. Is this the new trend for fall tv?
  • Why is Dan the one person who cares about Chuck? When did he become an internet psychologist who offers to tickle Chuck? And when did Chuck become lonely enough to sit there and listen to Dan?
  • It must be nice to be rich enough to wear your fancy clothes to get beat up.
  • Are they lip dubbing Elizabeth Hurley's speaking? It's like her lips don't match up with the words coming out of her mouth?
  • I also think it's hilarious that in these royal/UES circles, the first conclusion the Princess comes to about Blair is that she's on drugs, then jumps to bulimia. If my friends go to the bathroom often, I assume it's diarrhea, IBS, or bladder problems. I guess that's a side effect of getting old.
  • How bitchy was Serena during the apartment showing? "I forgot my checkbook, but I saw your's in your purse." "Unless you went to the Maldives you should have plenty of money." I don't know why Charlie didn't just say: "I don't want to live with you and your terrible ponytails, Serena!"
  • Why do these kids make plans that are soooo out of touch with logic and reality? Serena says she was 1) going to call Charlie's mom to talk about their problems, and 2) call the bank and make it so that Charlie cannot be cut off. What? Overstepping boundaries! Then Dan, instead of trying to contact Vanessa, decides that he needs to hack into her bank and find out who is depositing the money. I thought Dan was supposed to be the intellectual one.
  • I really thought it was going to come out that Blair and the Prince had yet to consummate their relationship - because he seems so asexual and because she's been trying to appear ladylike.
  • I felt bad for Dan finding out that Blair slept with Chuck. First a bad hair cut, then that news. Then later Blair goes over to his place and talks about how she's slept with Louis 100s of times! Poor Dan. 
  • How shitty is it that last season the writers got everyone invested in Dair, then pretty much toss it aside and then leave us with this:

  • Also, the Princess and Priest making out = so over the top (like her accent).
Best outfit of the week: Blair's white dress for the feast.

Worst outfit of the week: Charlie's awful pants. What color was that? Each time she came on screen I thought she was pantsless.

The hat is also terrible. It makes me be a little more ok with Maria Bello's annoying hat on Prime Suspect.

So what did you think of the episode? Did I miss anything good in the first 10 minutes? Did you like Blair's first outfit - the yellow top with two different prints on the bottom? I'm still undecided on it.

Monday, October 3, 2011

Breaking Bad: End Times

Lucky cigarette -
not used as I expected.
Everyone freaks out.

End Times?! End Times?! How can you call this episode End Times?! I seriously panicked when I saw that this was the title of the episode, considering how last week's ended.

This week opens without giving us any time to even take a breath. The DEA protectors are outside waiting to escort Walt, Marie and the kids to Hank's as per Marie's request. As the Whites pack a bag quickly, Walt explains that he's not going - he's the one who is the target - no one is safe around him. Skylar is seriously freaked out:

The many faces of Skylar White.
Marie wants to know how long it will be until Walt is safe. He explains that the negative results of every bad decision he's made is headed quickly in his direction. He calls Hank to blame the car wash on his absence and takes a second to say a goodbye to Holly. I begin to cry. He give Skylar a goodbye look too, it's just not as sad. But it's looks that say, "sorry I slept with Ted when you were recovering from cancer and I had just had our baby" and "sorry I started cooking meth."

At this point I may be the only person wondering where Walt Jr is. Seriously? Shouldn't they be concerned? Or at least have called him? Also, I don't think protective custody should drive with their windows down. Is that just me?

Snipers! Aim here!
Walt takes a moment by the pool to play Spin the Bottle Gun by himself. He's trying to hatch a plan, but I think he realizes - as does the gun - that unless a miracle happens, his time is up.

Aww, crap.

At Hank's we see that Walt Jr. is there - phew, cause I've been imagining [hoping?] that he's gonna get killed this season - and he's upset that his dad isn't there. Marie is equally nervous and in typical Marie fashion, is acting crazy. I'm surprised she hasn't tried to steal something in the last few minutes.

Hank shares his theory about Gus with the group. Immediately, Steve tries to blow off his theory. Once again, shady. Hank insults his manhood which in turn leads Steve to head off immediately to the cleaners. He tells some dumb story/lie about a heroin dealing chef with a senator dad being the reason he's there. He then manipulates Dennis, the laundry king, to let Steve and his partner look around. They, along with a drug sniffing dog, look around the premises while Jesse and Tyrus are in the lab. They have to be quiet as the DEA pokes around upstairs. Tyrus gets a call, but it's for Jesse. Of courses - Tyrus is all "Bitch, please." He wanted a phone call for himself:
"No one ever calls for me."
It's Gus! Jesse reminds him that if anything final happens to Mr. White, he's done. Gus ain't scared, he's already come up with an "appropriate response."

Find out what that is after the JUMP!